"Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net"

“Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net”

Today, I’ve decided to lighten the mood and reveal one of my embarrassing moments. I hope it makes you smile…

I’m not the most polished person you will ever meet.  I’m shy. And the introversion, from which I suffer, has caused me to act flat-out nutty at times. Over the years people have mistaken this quiet quality for being stuck-up. (I haven’t said that word since the 80s) As I grow older I seem to be emerging out of this. I will own up to the fact that I can be a little vain. I actually think my vanity is just insecurity in disguise. When I’m out of my element this lack of self-confidence causes me to act “backwards.” However, for me, shyness interlocked with vanity makes for embarrassing situations.

I was once in a store where I noticed a familiar face. I hadn’t seen this person in probably 20 years. She was across from me in a busy roomful of shoppers. I kid you not, every time I see someone I haven’t seen in years I have no make-up on and my hair is in a pony tail. (Why? Why is it that when I’m looking my best, I see no one? And, why is it that when my house is clean no one stops over without calling? These are the deep questions in life.)

Anyway, I didn’t want to be seen in my disheveled state, so I did the only two things I knew to do.  First, I prayed for the person.  (Not because I thought she needed it, but because I know that EVERYONE needs it, and I’ve trained myself to do this.) And second, I avoided her the best way I knew how.  I was carefully focusing on each item I needed, taking care to keep my head down while moving quickly throughout the store.  I could almost hear the music played in spy movies.  You know… the music that sounds while the clever spy navigates in and out without a hitch. Well, in my case it’s probably more like the music you hear for Inspector Clouseau in The Pink Panther. (I can relate to him so much better.)

After I gathered all the items I needed, I stood in line to pay for my merchandise. I no longer saw the person I was avoiding. I wiped my brow while breathing a deep sigh of relief.  All I had to do was pay for my items, and I would be home free.  In a very strange twist of events, when I finally reached the place in line where I could see the cashier, but also the place where I couldn’t escape due to the people in front and behind me, I realized that the cashier was the person I was trying to avoid! This person didn’t have a uniform on when I first saw her!  My heart stopped! At that moment, I was certain I wasn’t only going to be judged for looking like an older, chubbier, make-up-free version of myself, but that I would also be judged for trying to avoid her with my classic Inspector Clouseau skills.

When I finally arrived at the front of the line, I tried to avoid all eye contact while praying there would be no price checks for feminine products.  Then it happened. She said almost smugly, “Hi Jenny.”  I was busted. She had seen me.  My thoughts consisted of something like this, “Oh my! Oh my!” (Yeah, I am SO quick witted. Don’t you think?) Why couldn’t I have just told the truth or come up with a fabulous excuse as to why I was claiming avoidance? I don’t know. Instead, I pretended to give a double take and say, “Oh my goodness!!! I didn’t even recognize you! How are you?” (I hate lying! Lying is bad, and I am a terrible at it!)

If the person of whom I am speaking happens to read this, and this story sounds strangely familiar to you, I’m sorry. It’s not you; it’s me.  I’m a little zany, a lot vain, overly insecure, and very shy. I wasn’t pleased with my outward appearance, and I had no idea what to say.

I’m thankful for a God Who accepts me and all my “Lucille Ball moments.”  I’m thankful that even in my small worries and self inflicted flashes of embarrassment, He will still somehow come to my rescue. (Don’t ask me how He rescued me that night. All I know is that I didn’t see anything awful about myself on Facebook and therefore, I will claim God rescued me.)

Psalm 4:1

Hear me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have relieved me in my distress; Have mercy on me, and hear my prayer. (N.K.J.V.)

Yes, Lord, Have mercy!!!!!


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