Hello Friends. I hope this finds you well and that you each had a lovely Thanksgiving. It’s been a while since I’ve written. The days have melted into one another and the drive of the holiday season has sent me into a busy forward motion. My days have been full of shopping, cooking, cleaning, and baking. I’m getting ready to direct three children’s musicals. And in the middle of it all I’m looking for peace.

Many of the traditional Christmas Carols speak of peace on earth. Right now, my prayer is that each morning when I open my eyes, God will spill His peace all over me. It seems that the sparkle of lights and brilliance of evergreen has awakened my senses to reminisce years gone by and long for those who aren’t with me anymore.

I’m wrestling with fresh loss.

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.

James 1: 17

Oh yes. I’m still learning to accept those gifts – to remember that even when they seem to come wrapped in pain, that they are still glorious mysteries sustained by wonderment and faith. These gifts are often ashes, which have either already turned, or will soon turn to beauty. They are birthed through tears and given life by grace through faith. In Jesus name He renders the broken whole.

And even though I know and believe every word of the previous paragraph to be true…

We had an empty seat at our Thanksgiving table this year, and I would be dishonest if I didn’t tell you that I’ve grappled with God over it. You see, I’ve watched elderly grandparents I loved very much leave to be with Jesus, but to have a beautiful man who was only aged 58 years to be ripped from our lives so suddenly… well, it literally has me walking around with a burning sensation in my heart.

It’s real.

It’s deep.

It hurts.

So I’ve formulated a plan…

I’m choosing joy.

I’m choosing peace.

I’m choosing life.

I’m still here living and breathing the beauty and knowledge of Christ’s birth, death, and resurrection. I have to keep going. I have memories to make for my children, and seeds to scatter for my children’s children. I want to be known as a woman of faith in the midst of adversity. Even if I don’t see the beauty in the middle of the ashes, I want to believe that it’s there – the same way I believe that my God still reigns on His throne regardless of my circumstances.

And today, in the midst of your ashes, I’m asking you to believe that beauty surrounds. Believe that peace and joy are choices you can make. Why? Because you serve a God who doesn’t disappoint. He’s never left you and He isn’t about to now. You’ve never been, and you never will be, alone.

I’m constantly rediscovering Christ’s truth. He shows me in new ways through divine appointments. He makes me aware of small miracles that have the power to move giant mountains. His breath is the wind that separates the wheat from the chaff and makes the harvest rich.

Let’s believe to reap a harvest of good and perfect gifts out of every circumstance. Let us remember that all peace comes through His name alone, and that He is the Father of lights who longs to call us closer to Him through every opportunity.

May you find peace and strength today, friends. And may you choose joy!

Love,

Jennifer

PS: If you’ve lost a baby due to miscarriage or stillbirth, please consider sharing your story through the Nothing to Hold but Hope Healing project. You can find out all about that here…