The other day, I sat on my bed distraught by the reality of how different my life is today from this time one year ago. Last year, I picked him out a television for Christmas. This year, a headstone. The other day I told a friend via text message that I just keep going, going, and going some more so that I won’t be weighed down by the grief of it all.

But then I remembered something: grief can only weigh me down if I allow it.

I know that to be true. And so I’m fighting to stand upright. One of the ways I fight is by means of the Word of God. So as I sat on my bed, I opened up my worn, red, leather Bible and went to battle. I’ve been studying the life of Jesus, and that means spending a lot of time rereading the Gospels. Like so many times before, I began reacquainting myself with the birth of Christ. However, I found another birth story. It’s one of rebirth, adoption, and wild, unhindered grace…

To understand this particular birth story, you have to comprehend that Jesus didn’t just come on Christmas day. He has always existed.

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. ² He was in the beginning with God. ³ All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made. ⁴ In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. ⁵ And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.

-John 1:1-5

If you look closely at the above scripture, you will realize that the word, Word is capitalized. It’s referring to Jesus. He has always been and everything made was made through Him. In Him is life. And because of that life, there is light that shines in the darkest places. Even in the black, hollowed out, grief stricken spots.

As that truth began to stir inside my soul, I could already feel the hope begin to well up from the deepest part of my grief. ..

There was a man sent from God, whose name was John. ⁷ This man came for a witness, to bear witness of the Light, that all through him might believe. ⁸ He was not that Light, but was sent to bear witness of that Light. ⁹ That was the true Light which gives light to every man coming into the world.

¹⁰ He was in the world, and the world was made through Him, and the world did not know Him. ¹¹ He came to His own, and His own did not receive Him.

-John 1:6-11

The previous verses are talking about John the Baptist preparing the way for Christ. Isaiah prophesied concerning him. John came preaching repentance and remission of sins. But even with Isaiah’s prophesy fulfilled, Christ was still rejected. “He came to His own, and His own did not receive Him.” (See John 1:11)

And then comes the part where the burden of my grief is lifted. The load has been taken because of who my Father is. You see, what I realized as I read these scriptures, is that this rebirth and adoption story is mine.

And it can be yours too!

¹² But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name: ¹³ who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.

-John 1:12-13

I have received Christ. I’ve made the decision to live for Him, to submit my life to Him completely, and that means letting go of the burden and the heavy weight of grief. Just like a little girl, I can run into the arms of my Father and know that He is more than enough for me. It’s up to Him to win the war over grief for me. And He will.

I am His child because I believe in His Son. And if you believe, then you too have been adopted by wild, unhindered, amazing, grace. The kind that can lift any burden and heal any heart. The kind of grace that says all things are possible. Why? Because Jesus lives…

JESUS LIVES!

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth.

¹⁵ John bore witness of Him and cried out, saying, “This was He of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me is preferred before me, for He was before me.’”

¹⁶ And of His fullness we have all received, and grace for grace. ¹⁷ For the law was given through Moses, but grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. ¹⁸ No one has seen God at any time. The only begotten Son, who is in the bosom of the Father, He has declared Him.

John 1:14-19

“And of His fullness we have ALL received, and grace for grace.”

Grace for grace, my friends!

Love,

Jennifer