As each day moves closer to the day I share my book with you, I’m beginning to feel some fear. I will be telling you my whole story. Confessing my hurt, and how I dealt with it. I will be uncovering my whole heart to you. Today, as I was feeling discouraged, I remembered this story…
When I was a young teenager I stayed after school with some friends. I can’t remember the reason why I had to stay. However, what happened that day lives in my memory forever.
The weather was lovely, and I was sitting outside on a little stoop eating a personal pan pizza with two friends. I heard my name being called by a teacher who was standing on the opposite side of the lawn. He yelled, “Catch!” while proceeding to throw a football at me. I, being as sure footed and graceful as I was, stood up and started running towards the ball. That is the last thing I remember before my face hit the ground.
Yes, I tripped over my own two feet and landed right on my face in front of a large group of people. I have begged God to know why I could write a list a mile long with similar incidents on it that would make you feel much better about your own life, and balance. All I can say is God made me a little clumsy and there must be a good reason for it. At least it makes me feel better to tell myself that.
Here is the problem. To this day, if someone called my name and yelled that frightening word, “Catch!” I would cover my head and hope for the best. I can say with one hundred percent certainty, “I would not dare run after that ball!”
There have been many symbolic “footballs” thrown at me in my life. If I’m uncertain about something, I usually act the same way I would if a real ball was heading in my direction – I would cover my head. I’m afraid of failure. I’m slowly working to break free of all the silly little things which have contributed to holding me back. It’s a process. Each day I’m learning to put one foot in front of the other. I may trip and lose my balance, but I will get back up.
As I was remembering that day which I really, really, really would love to forget, I opened up my Bible and saw the following scripture staring me in the face.
Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He Who promised is faithful. (N.K.J.V.)
I might be clumsy in day-to-day life. I might trip over my own two feet and sometimes feel as if I don’t belong, but I refuse to be clumsy in my faith. I put every ounce of hope I have in Jesus. He is my hope. I do it without wavering, because I know He is faithful. Sometimes fear sets in, but my hope in Him will always outweigh it.
Whatever happens or doesn’t happen regarding this new adventure in my life, I know God has a plan. In conclusion, I’m going to run towards the “ball!”
What about you? Are you ready to run towards something new in your life?